


The Bonds That Tie Us

by Spicaa



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: Blood Loss, F/M, Katniss begins to understand Effie I guess, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-04 17:01:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15845556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spicaa/pseuds/Spicaa
Summary: Katniss has no patience for Haymitch's drunken antics, Peeta and Effie spent time in captivity and some days they can barely bear each other's company, Haymitch and Effie argue on a nearly daily basis.In truth, Katniss doesn't know how long it'll last. She doubts it will.





	The Bonds That Tie Us

**Author's Note:**

> I read so many stories where Katniss and Haymitch share a moment, or it's Effie and Peeta - but I rarely see stories about Katniss and Effie. I wanted to write something about them becoming friends, of sorts (this is really not about Katniss and Effie being a couple, by the way - ships are still Katniss/Peeta and Haymitch/Effie). I'm of the opinion that for certain thing only girls can understand girls, and this is one of those situations.
> 
> Warning: without spoiling anything, this story contains some graphic situations concerning blood.

 

 

Katniss crosses the gate of the village quietly, not really in a hurry. It's a little chilly for October, but it's sunny, so it's nice outside. The old fountain is back to life due to some much needed maintenance a few weeks ago; she's on her way to Haymitch's when two kids pass by her, followed by their mother. She smiles a little. It's good to see some life around the place.

Most of the houses have been occupied by people who used to live in Twelve, and also construction workers and their families, designated by the government to help with the rebuilding. Peeta managed to drag Haymitch to help him with the bakery earlier this morning — a rare feat, since Haymitch rarely leaves his house. It's been happening more and more lately; Katniss suspects it's because Haymitch is finally getting sick of Effie.

Well, it's weird enough that she turned up uninvited back in June, and chose to stay in one of Haymitch's spare bedrooms instead of Katniss' house, or even Peeta's. Since then, Peeta let go of his house to stay with her, and to allow more people to come back to Twelve. Progress is slow — both in the district, and in their relationship. Katniss doesn't mind — but she knows it'll be a while before she feels confident Peeta won't break into her bedroom and choke her to death in her sleep.

But it gets a little better every day.

Katniss moves past the main door to go to the backyard; the geese are making a ruckus and she rolls her eyes — only Haymitch would get geese for pets. Effie hates them, she knows — Katniss suspects she's nagged Haymitch so much that the former escort is the reason why he built them a pen last month.

The backdoor is unlocked so Katniss easily makes her way into the kitchen, bringing the two dead birds she caught with her. The house is silent — not all unusual, since Haymitch is out and Effie often sleeps in late.

It's ironic, really, Katniss thinks. Effie would knock on their doors at ungodly hours for them to be ready for interviews and photos in the past — now she seems to sleep the mornings away.

Katniss tries not to judge; they all went through something during the war. She knows Effie was imprisoned for a while.

Everyone copes differently. She hunts, cries when she remembers Prim, tries not to miss her own mother. Peeta locks himself in his bedroom — sometimes he just bakes on his own. Haymitch drinks, and curses the geese as if no one knows he actually likes them. Effie… well, apparently, she sleeps. She cleans, too, and for that Katniss is grateful because this means Haymitch's house is no longer a pigsty.

But they have a weird dynamic, Katniss thinks. Sometimes they'll go days without even seeing Haymitch. Sometimes they'll have dinner and Effie will be talking loudly and Katniss will feel as if she's back on that train, the first time she went to the Capitol. Between the four of them, they argue sometimes — Katniss has no patience for Haymitch's drunken antics, Peeta and Effie spent time in captivity and some days they can barely bear each other's company, Haymitch and Effie argue on a nearly daily basis (and Katniss knows this because she hears them from across the street sometimes).

In truth, Katniss doesn't know how long it'll last. She doubts it will.

The kitchen is immaculate this morning, with the exception of a dirty cup in the sink, and a few bread crumbles on the table — no doubt remnants of whatever breakfast Haymitch had. Katniss supposes she must be grateful he didn't go straight to whiskey.

She puts the birds on the counter and leaves her bow and arrow on the corner; a thud can be heard from upstairs so Katniss imagines Effie's up.

"Effie, it's just me!" Katniss yells distractedly. "Just brought you something."

Effie always complains about the yelling, but Katniss doesn't care, so she'll continue to do so until they invent a better form of communication.

She goes on with her task — to clean the birds as quickly as possible, because Effie loves good food but she also hates seeing what has to happen to animals for them to become food. She works swiftly — far too used to the task after so many years. She assumes Effie must be cleaning upstairs, because she hears steps and thuds, but no reply comes from her and she doesn't come to check who's downstairs.

It takes Katniss about forty minutes to deal with both birds and put them in the fridge; Haymitch and Peeta will likely show up later for lunch, but she got up early and she's hungry already. Effie is more or less helpless in the kitchen — Katniss thinks Haymitch has been trying to teach her some stuff, but she and Peeta have yet to try anything edible.

Still, it's unusual to be in Haymitch's house without Effie's regular loud voice complaining about something or other. Even more unusual that Effie is apparently awake and not bothering to greet her.

With a sigh, Katniss decides to go upstairs. She'll ask if Effie minds having sandwiches for lunch and then she'll work on those — preferably without Effie's help.

It's been a while since Katniss ventured upstairs, actually — she's only come here twice, to see if Haymitch is awake or dead (considering how much he drinks, that's a possibility). It's remarkably unchanged, the corridor — most of the doors to what Katniss knows to be guest rooms are open and she realizes she has no idea where Effie has been staying, since it was Peeta who took her suitcases upstairs when she arrived.

"Effie?" Katniss calls.

There's no response.

She tries the bathroom at the end of the corridor first, but the door is half open and it looks like nobody has used that bathroom in a while. Well, it's not all that surprising, as Katniss thinks Haymitch must have given Effie the only other suite in the house.

That turns out to be empty as well, when she checks it a second later.

"Effie!"

She's starting to get worried.

She checks the other closed door — only to find what appears to be a room full of junk, devoid of Effie's presence.

Which only leaves Haymitch's bedroom to be checked.

While trying not to deal with the fact that Effie might be sleeping in Haymitch's bedroom (which is possible, right? He could be sleeping in one of the guest bedrooms to favor her the biggest room), Katniss crosses the corridor slowly, passing by the staircase, suddenly aware of how silent the house is. Perhaps Effie simply never woke up, and the noise Katniss heard earlier was something else. Or perhaps someone broke into the house — or perhaps it was a journalist.

The possibilities get worse with each second.

She still checks the open doors she passes by, finding the rooms completely unchanged and untouched. Sometimes she does understand how Haymitch got to the drinking point — it's not easy to deal with such a big house with it being so empty. She has enough trouble with hers, and she shares it with Peeta now. Perhaps that's why Haymitch agreed to Effie's visit.

Finally, she's almost at the last door.

And nearly jumps when Buttercup comes out of the room.

"Stupid cat," she rolls her eyes. He meows at her, looking particularly annoyed. "How did you even get here? You don't live here."

The cat walks past her, effectively ignoring her words.

Katniss shakes her head and knocks on the open door, noting the clearly used sheets and open window. Sunlight is dropping through the curtains, and it gives the room a comfortable feel. Everything looks way too tidy, and Katniss sees Effie's lotions and perfumes at the dressing table. This is clearly the room she's been using.

But it's all empty.

"Effie?" Katniss calls again, louder, entering the bedroom. She walks towards the bathroom door. "Effie!"

She knocks on the door.

_Finally_ , Effie responds.

" _Yes_ ,  _Katniss_?"

Her voice is low, lower than it would be necessary to remind Katniss that she shouldn't be shouting. But Katniss finds she's relieved Effie is apparently in the house and apparently unharmed.

"I just wanted to check on you," Katniss says to the door. "I've been here for like an hour."

There's silence. And then…

" _Yes, I heard."_

Katniss frowns. She heard and never thought to say hi? That seems so unlike Effie.

"Is everything okay?" Katniss asks.

Silence again. She thinks she can hear breathing.

" _Yes, everything's just fine."_

"Since Haymitch and Peeta won't be back until later, I thought I'd make us some sandwiches for lunch," Katniss says slowly. Effie hates sandwiches for lunch — she's prepared to hear a complaint. "Do you mind?"

" _No, that's just perfect."_

Katniss nods, even though Effie can't see her. This is the first time Katniss hears Effie calling sandwiches perfect — she doesn't really complain about them once she eats, but everyone knows she isn't fond of them. Maybe because that's what they gave the prisoners back in the Capitol — dry, tasteless pieces of bread.  _When_  they got any food.

She knows this from Peeta.

"Or I could fry some chicken wings," Katniss offers impulsively. She's not as good at cooking as Peeta is, or Haymitch, for that matter. She can make do just fine, but no fancy stuff. "Which do you prefer?"

A beat passes.

" _Anything's fine, Katniss."_

Katniss hears the impatience in her voice and takes a deep breath, trying not to get annoyed at the former escort. She doesn't know exactly what Effie went through, but she figures it must have been bad if she decided to hide in Twelve, of all places. Still, there's something else beyond impatience in her voice — exhaustion, maybe.

"Are you alright, Effie?"

In the past, Effie would have loved the attention. Nowadays…

" _Katniss, you can go now. I'll just—I'm not really hungry now, I'll have lunch later."_

Not denying or confirming she's fine, then. In the spur of a moment, Katniss makes her mind.

"Effie, I'm going in," she announces, and she hopes Effie's at least decent, because Katniss doesn't really give her time to protest before opening the unlocked door.

The first thing Katniss sees is the blood.

It's the first thing she smells, too.

The bathroom is gray — used to be white, but the color has worn off after so many years. There are droplets of blood near the sink and a whole puddle in front of the toilet — some of it smeared with footprints. Effie is inside the bathtub, and Katniss sees blood in the fingers she's using to grip the tub. There's a moment of shock between the two of them — just a few seconds, not more, and Katniss looks at Effie's face — devoid of makeup and with a trace of tears on her cheeks. She looks flushed, too.

"We have to get you to the clinic," Katniss says slowly. "We need to stop the bleeding."

Effie shakes her head. "No. I won't go. Don't make me go."

"Effie, this isn't normal," Katniss says, approaching the tub slowly. Effie is wearing a satin nightgown that used to be pink, but is now covered in blood as well. There's no water at all — just blood. An awful lot.

Effie keeps shaking her head. "I think… I think it's nearly over."

Katniss frowns. "Over? Effie, we need to stop the bleeding. I'll call the clinic."

"I won't go," she says again. "I can't go, I—"

She stops speaking and pants instead, her knuckles turning white as she grips the edges of the tub tighter. A long moan escapes her lips and her face contorts itself in pain, and Katniss  _knows this_. She has seen this — more than once, when she was younger and her mother would help young women in the Seam.

It takes a few seconds for Effie to breathe properly again. Her eyes are watery with tears and her skin is sweaty.

"How far apart are they?" Katniss asks, still frowning. "The contractions."

Effie lets out a long breath. "Not… not long."

"I have to call the clinic, Effie," Katniss says. "We need a doctor. You could get an infection—"

"I won't go to the clinic, I won't."

"I'll ask them to get a doctor here," Katniss says decisively. Effie starts to protest, but Katniss interrupts her. "I'm serious. I don't know how to deal with this. You need a doctor."

She leaves the bathroom then, nearly running downstairs for the phone — and almost tripping against Buttercup, who's staring at her on top of the stairs. She explains the situation quickly, but the woman on the phone says the doctor will only be able to get here in thirty minutes — Katniss knows a lot can happen in thirty minutes, but they don't have a choice. That's the time it would take her to get Haymitch and Peeta from the bakery.

She runs upstairs, stopping by the linen closet and grabbing a few towels. She doesn't know much but the basics, and she tries to remember the last time she's seen something like this; probably before she was reaped.

When she gets back to the bathroom Effie is panting again.

"Another?" Katniss asks as she cleans the bathroom floor as much as she can with a towel; the job only works enough to get most of the blood out, but still leaves a trail on the floor. She gets another clean towel and wets it with tap water, then sits by the tub and reaches to set it against Effie's forehead. "Better?"

Effie is still panting. "A little."

"How long have you been in here?"

"A few hours," Effie says slowly. "I just… felt the cramps, and then there was  _so_   _much_  blood…"

"You should have called me," Katniss says, taking the cool cloth and pressing it against her temple.

Effie shakes her head. "There was too much… it's not my first time," she says resolutely, although her voice cracks slightly. "It's almost over."

Katniss would never call Effie anything but determined, but her eyes look hollow as she says the words.

She isn't wrong, though; it's over when the next contraction hits, a few seconds later. Katniss offers her hand for Effie to hold and doesn't mind the pain on her fingers when the former escort screams. She tries not to look down on the tub, and breathes through her nose, and instead just grips Effie's hand throughout the contraction. Effie slumps against the back of the bathtub, her face puffy with tears and flushed with exertion and more blood flows down, enough for Katniss to notice it.

Effie blinks a few times. A tear runs down her cheek — Katniss doesn't think it's from pain now.

They stay like that for a few minutes, holding hands. Katniss doesn't know enough, but she knows they'll have to move Effie soon. It's Effie herself who slackens the hold on Katniss and moves slowly.

"I need to get cleaned," Effie sniffs, looking a little shocked.

Katniss nods. "Yeah, just… let's get you out and I'll clean the tub, okay?"

Effie shakes her head. "No, I'll take a shower. No need to…I want to do it myself, later."

Katniss nods. "Alright. I can get you some clean clothes, if you want."

"Yes, thank you, dear," Effie says, managing to step out of the tub carefully. Her pale legs are stained red with blood.

Katniss leaves her then, and goes back to the bedroom to find Effie some clothes; she isn't sure where to look for them at first but eventually decides to go for the obvious route — the massive wardrobe instead of the cabinet. She finds underwear in a drawer, all very organized by color and style, apparently, but Katniss doesn't duel on that and selects a plain cotton pair; woolen socks that look comfortable and then a pair of pants that look to be Haymitch's, as well as a shirt — Katniss doesn't think Effie has much comfortable clothing of her own.

She knocks softly against the half open bathroom door — the bathroom is big enough that Katniss doesn't have a clear view of the running shower. She leaves the clothes on the counter and takes the towels she brought in the first place — this time cleaning the floor better. She takes Effie's blood stained clothes as well. The room still smells like blood, though.

After putting the clothes away — either for laundry or to be thrown away, Katniss would leave that to Effie — she goes back to the bedroom and thinks she may as well organize it. She makes the bed, noting both creased pillows; closes the bedside table drawer that was open — there's a book inside about philosophy, she thinks; and she can't help but make a face when she sees a creased undershirt clearly thrown carelessly on the floor.

It's clear Effie and Haymitch are more than Katniss initially thought. She's a little shocked, in all honesty. But a little sad, as well.

She doesn't think her cleaning is up to Effie Trinket's standards, but when Effie emerges from the bathroom she gives Katniss a tired smile.

"You didn't have to do this," she says softly, and Katniss worries she may cry now. "Thank you, dear."

"No problem," Katniss doesn't meet her eyes. "You should lie down."

The masculine outfit makes Effie seem smaller than ever — that, and the no makeup look, make her almost unrecognizable. She's barely comfortable in bed when the bell rings. They share a look.

"It's the doctor," Katniss announces. She has been hovering around, a little unsure of what to do, since Effie showed up. Effie grabs her wrist as she makes to go downstairs. Her eyes look worried. "I'll stay here if you want me to. Okay?"

Effie nods.

The doctor is a young woman with olive skin and dark eyes who introduces herself as Dr. Emmy Winkleman — she smiles when Katniss opens the door and follows her without much comment when Katniss tells her what the problem is. She doesn't blame Effie for worrying — Katniss isn't much of a fan of strangers anyway.

The doctor goes straight to business after a few questions Effie answers hesitantly; some of them are answered by Katniss herself. A quick examination follows, and while Effie tells her she doesn't have to stay, Katniss isn't about to simply trust anyone like that; she ends up hovering around the corridor, listening to the doctor's words while a judgmental Buttercup stares at her from his spot by the staircase.

"Couldn't have warned me something was wrong?" Katniss mumbles as she approaches the cat. She sits down on a chair that has definitely seen better days in front of him. The cat simply looks at her. "I know I'm not Prim, but I called a doctor."

Prim would have known what to do, that's for sure.

Then again, her mother would too. If she had decided to stick to Twelve instead of running away.

It seems like a long time before the doctor emerges from the bedroom, and Katniss startles, standing up quickly. The woman gives her a tight smile, and Katniss guides her down the stairs.

"It would be nice if Ms. Trinket could rest for the next few days," Dr. Winkleman says. Katniss thinks she may be from District 13, judging by her accent. "I've given her some medicine that may help the pain and vitamins, but there's not much to be done anymore."

They reach the bottom of the stairs.

"She lost it," Katniss states.

The doctor nods a little sadly. "She did. It's not unusual. Nature takes its course," the woman says. "She should be fine in a week or two, but I'd advise to be careful. I've left a list of herbs that may help as well. Other than that, just make sure she's comfortable, well-rested, and having enough food."

Katniss nods. "Yeah, sure."

"It's not a good time to be alone. Physically and emotionally," Dr. Winkleman tells her. "I want her in for a check-up in two weeks. If you could remind her or her partner of it…"

"Sure. I won't forget," Katniss promises.

The doctor leaves with a nod and a smile. She knows who they all are, of course. Everybody does. It's nice to meet someone who doesn't seem to mind it.

It's really weird to think of Haymitch and Effie as partners — it was already weird when they worked together. Now, Katniss doesn't know what to make of it. That is if the doctor's assumption is correct. She supposes there is a possibility that Effie was with someone before coming to Twelve but — well, considering she's been here for three months, it seems unlikely. There aren't enough people around, and Katniss has noticed Effie tends to distance herself from townspeople.

She sighs as she closes the door after the doctor. It's just her luck that Peeta isn't around to deal with this. He would know what to say.

Katniss finds the bedroom empty when she goes upstairs, though.

"Effie?" She calls, a little alarmed.

"In here," Effie's voice replies from the bathroom. Katniss follows the voice, and stops by the doorway. Effie is leaning over the bathtub, and she doesn't turn though she's aware of Katniss' presence. "I'm fine. Just cleaning."

"Alright," Katniss says, taking a step back and feeling the need to give her some privacy. "I'm gonna make us some soup, okay?"

"There's no need," Effie says. "Haymitch made some last night. I wasn't feeling well, so… there must be enough for the two of us in the fridge."

Katniss watches her for a moment; kneeling next to the tub, back straight, voice loud. But she can see through it, though — the detachment is there. Katniss doesn't question it.

"Okay. I'll just reheat it, then," she tells her. Effie nods and says nothing else.

Katniss spends the next few minutes in the kitchen. Buttercup has followed her there, and watches her as she reheats the soup Haymitch made. Not exactly what she'd choose for lunch, but his soup isn't bad and Katniss feels it would be insensitive to Effie to eat anything else.

She's intending to take the soup upstairs when Effie shows up, looking a little pale.

"You should be resting," Katniss tells her. Effie sits down on one of the chairs by the small circular table. Usually when she and Peeta have a meal at Haymitch's, Effie insists for them to use the dining room. Today seems to be an exception.

Effie sighs. "I'm not an invalid. I promise I'll sit and lie down today."

"You could stay in the living room, if you want. I'll bring the food there," Katniss suggests.

Effie makes a face. "Food in the living room? Goodness, no. If I do that I'll just be allowing Haymitch to do it eventually."

"I think he'd make an exception to the rule," Katniss gives her a pointed look.

Effie blinks, then looks away. "I'm alright. I'd rather eat here, anyway."

In the end, there must be enough soup to feed Peeta and Haymitch as well; Effie only eats half a bowl before announcing she's full. When Katniss insists, she recoils a little, looks strangely vulnerable.

"I've been fighting off the nausea for a few days," she confesses. "It's fine. I'll just try to eat again in a few hours. Some salty crackers usually do the trick."

Katniss doesn't question her.

They finish the meal in silence and Effie announces she'll be in the living room. Buttercup follows her. Katniss cleans the kitchen and tries to make sense of the situation. It's hard to do so without being intrusive.

Haymitch has always kept to himself, and Effie has always  _not_  kept to herself. It seems surreal that two people who are so different would get together and… well.

Maybe it's a new thing, Katniss ponders. Effie is different after the war. Gone are the wigs and heavy makeup and flamboyant attire. Her clothes are still tight and short and her heels are still high when she goes out. Sometimes she wears a scarf over her head, though Katniss doesn't get it — her hair is perfectly fine. It's short, even, which is very practical.

But Effie isn't a practical person. So perhaps her hair used to be longer and now she's ashamed of it or something. Or she just thinks natural hair doesn't fit her as well as the wigs.

To each their own.

Katniss brings a glass of water and salty crackers to the living room. She leaves the teapot on the stove, planning to make some Angelica root tea later. The television is on and some sort of show is playing. Peeta has seen it occasionally. Katniss never pays attention to it.

Effie has made herself comfortable around a blanket, and Buttercup is by her side on the floor. He actually  _is_  letting her petting him. The cat has always had a weird taste in people anyway.

Except for Prim.

Katniss puts the crackers and the water on the coffee table and sits down on a separate chair to not bother Effie; it's Haymitch's favorite, and the chair is rough and well-used. Too well-used, in fact. Katniss has found him passed out on it more than once.

She glances at the television, not really interested. It's a drama show and Katniss thinks the main actress is a little over the top.

"Haymitch hates it when I watch this show," Effie comments. It may sound like a complaint but her tone is soft. "He's always saying we could use less drama."

Katniss snorts. Sounds like Haymitch.

"I think he secretly likes it," she continues. "We always end up watching the whole thing together."

Sounds like Haymitch as well.

Katniss looks at Effie — her hair is dried by now, and it's unruly and a little wavy; dirty blonde looks good on her. It's the first time Katniss  _actually_ sees her sans makeup, though — the heavy layers are no longer in fashion but Effie is always sporting a different shade of lipstick or eyeshadow. She looks better like this; younger, different.

"Thank you, for helping," Effie says after a moment. "I know I should have called the clinic, but it's hard to think logically in certain moments."

Katniss nods. "I know how it feels."

Effie clears her throat, looking away from the television.

"I'd like to ask you not to tell Haymitch about the baby," she says, looking very determined. There's almost a warning in her voice.

"He has to know, Effie. You have to rest for the next days. He'll help if he knows," Katniss tells her.

Effie blinks, her voice falters a little. "Yes, certainly. I just meant that I'd like to be the one to tell him."

" _Oh_ ," Katniss says, feeling a little flustered. "Yeah, of course," she agrees quickly. "I'm, uh, sorry. About the baby."

Effie smiles a little sadly. "It's fine. I wasn't sure about it anyway," she lets out a deep breath. "I didn't have time to get attached to it. I thought… I thought my body was finally going to be regular after so much time. Silly, isn't it? That I thought the cramps and the bleeding to be normal until they weren't. I'm not exactly new to this."

Her hands are scratching Buttercup's ear. The cat seems so well behaved that Katniss thinks it's suspicious.

"My mom used to say it's different for every woman. Never the same," Katniss says. Effie looks at her questioningly. "She helped women in the Seam, before. The ones who didn't want children. It, uh, happened a lot around here."

Effie nods. "I can see how women would be driven to that."

"Sometimes it costed them their lives," Katniss comments, not really thinking about it.

"I can see that, too."

"Would you have done it?"

"No."

Buttercup walks away then, and it seems to startle Effie a little. She sits straighter on the couch, runs a hand through her curls, adjusts the blanket around her. The shirt she's wearing make her seem even thinner.

"I didn't plan it, but I think… it would be nice to give life to a child," Effie says softly, "instead of taking them to their deaths."

She wipes at her face with the back of her hand. Katniss regrets asking the question — she's probably emotional enough as it is.

"I apologize," Effie continues, then reaches for a tissue from a little box on the coffee table. "It's silly, really. Haymitch would never want it."

Katniss is pretty sure he wouldn't. She knows she doesn't; she doesn't see a future in which she has children of her own, anyway. Family is such a complicated matter. People always end up leaving, one way or the other. Like her father and Prim, or like her mother. Like Finnick, and Rue.

But Haymitch hasn't had family in a much longer time. He has had no one, in fact. And Katniss knows Effie has lost her family as well. She doesn't blame Effie for wanting something like that again.

"I don't know. I think he'd have kept it," Katniss says. "It's just… we've all seen so much death. New life might be good for us."

Effie's eyes are bright and blue as she stares at Katniss.

"Yes. I agree," she says after a moment. "Well, it's no use thinking of it now."

"You never know," Katniss shrugs. "I mean, you still can, right?"

Effie snorts. Katniss has never seen her do that. It's a little funny. "Supposedly," she sighs. "I don't think I'm going to have a family."

Katniss frowns. "Why?"

"I've always wanted it. I'm good with children, you know?" Effie sniffs a little, but it appears the momentary tears are gone. "Especially little ones. But after taking so many—  _oh_ , I don't deserve it. I only got you and Peeta back. I was an escort for eight years and I only got two back."

"Don't be silly, Effie," Katniss says, more briskly than she intends to. "It wasn't your fault. You didn't kill them."

"I did help.  _I did_ ," she says, her voice louder now. "I took the names. I watched the Games. I helped. We all did."

"You were raised like that," Katniss shrugs. "I don't…  _blame_ you. Neither does Peeta. If anything you're a victim too."

"I remember them all," Effie continues, blinking fast. "Every single one of them. All of their names — I don't think Haymitch remembers them all. He drank so much during some particular years."

She sniffs again, dries her tears with a tissue. They spend a few minutes in silence, watching the ridiculous tv show.

"Haymitch never knew about the first baby."

Katniss turns her head, surprised Haymitch is even considered to have anything to do with that. She watches Effie — staring ahead, but not really seeing anything. It takes a moment for her to look back at Katniss. With her watery eyes, Katniss may have wondered just how much older Effie is, because the heartbroken look on her face makes her look even younger.

It's sad, really.

"I couldn't tell him, not without people finding out," she lets out a sigh. "And then the Quarter Quell… he had other things in his mind."

Katniss frowns. "Why did he leave you behind?"

"He thought I'd be safe in the Capitol," Effie answers. "He was wrong."

"Haymitch was wrong about a lot of things."

"Yes. We all were."

She reaches for the remote and switches channels — it's something about nature now.

"I didn't think you were together," Katniss says impulsively, still bewildered by it all. "Peeta asked when you first arrived. I told him no. But… you were, right? Or you have been, for a while."

There's a moment of silence, then Effie nods.

"Yes, I suppose so," she says at last. "It is hard… to label it, when you've hidden for so long."

Katniss asks no more questions, and Effie offers no further explanation.

They watch the documentary in silence after that. Effie eats the crackers, drinks the water, accepts the tea later. She says she's in some pain, but nothing unbearable. She goes to the bathroom every now and then but Katniss thinks that may be normal, for the circumstances. It's only after four that Haymitch comes in, from the front door; Effie is currently drinking more tea and Katniss is taking the second plate of crackers back to the kitchen.

The men have been joking, judging by the sly smirk on Haymitch's face and Peeta's voice from across the street, but Haymitch's face changes as soon as he sets his eyes on Effie.

"What's going on?" He asks immediately. He looks dirty from the construction and his hair is a mess. He still walks into the living room and stops by Effie; Katniss just stands there uncertainly, plates in one hand and an empty glass on the other. "You okay, sweetheart?"

Effie nods, and Katniss supposes it says enough of the situation that she reaches for Haymitch's likely dirty hand with her own. His eyes flicker past Katniss a little, and he looks tense all of a sudden.

"I'm fine, thanks to Katniss," Effie says.

Haymitch looks at Katniss expectantly.

"I'll just take these to the kitchen," Katniss says. "Then I'll go talk to Peeta. Will you be okay, Effie?"

"Yes, thank you, dear," Effie says, but she's looking at Haymitch.

Katniss leaves then. The last glimpse she catches of them is when she's turning the corner and Haymitch is sitting on the edge of the coffee table, holding both of Effie's hands.

It seems as if she is breathing for the first time when she leaves through the back door.

* * *

Katniss knocks three times before letting herself inside the house. Normally she wouldn't have bothered knocking, when Haymitch lived alone, but Effie is always talking about manners and — well, considering recent developments, Katniss thinks she may have a point. She wouldn't want to disturb them.

Buttercup is there at the living room, alone, playing with a colorful toy. A gift from Effie from a few weeks ago.

Katniss glares at him.

"This isn't your house," she says. "You shouldn't be here."

The cat remains unaffected.

The house seems empty, though, but she can hear the geese from the back — which means someone's probably out there.

She follows the noise.

Haymitch didn't go with Peeta to the bakery today, so she figures he must be feeding the geese. She makes her way through the house and opens the back door. She can't deny she's surprised to see Effie, not Haymitch, in the backyard.

She's crouching on the grass, putting a box inside a hole that must have been dug recently. Katniss lets the door close behind her and stands on the porch. Effie looks up alarmingly, then relaxes when she sees her, and smiles.

Katniss takes this as an invitation to go closer.

Effie is pushing soil into the hole, effectively burying the box. She's wearing clothes her own size today — a sleeveless blouse and a blue pair of pants. They almost look too comfortable to be Effie's. Her face looks makeup free too. The hair is properly straightened, though.

"I'm going to plant these flowers here," Effie says as she gets closer. She's pointing to a vase of blue irises that Katniss has never seen before. "Haymitch got them this morning."

Katniss smiles, but she can't help but feel a little surprised. "Didn't take you for a gardening person."

"Well, I do not love the getting dirty part," she raises her gloved hands to Katniss. "I do love flowers. It seemed like a good idea. Haymitch has his geese, I can have my flowers."

"Well, yours are prettier and quieter," Katniss comments. Effie laughs. Katniss thinks this may be the first comfortable conversation they've ever had. "You okay?"

There's a moment of silence.

"I will be," Effie says at last. She raises her eyes to look at Katniss, and tries to smile brighter. She has always been an optimistic, Katniss knows. It's not a bad thing to be nowadays. "Don't worry, I've been resting. I just wanted to do this today."

Katniss nods. She takes a deep breath, looks around a little awkwardly.

"Look, yesterday…"

"I'm very sorry you had to deal with all that, my dear," Effie interrupts her, a little flustered herself. "Truly, you were very supportive and I thank you for helping and just… well, listening, I suppose. It's been a while since I talked like that to someone. I have Haymitch, but sometimes… well, I haven't talked to my girlfriends in a long time. I'm not sure I want to."

"It's fine, Effie," Katniss says gently. "I mean, we're friends, right? And girls, I suppose."

Effie's face lights up. "Yes. I suppose we are."

The smile is so bright Katniss is a little embarrassed.

"I was just gonna say I think you deserve it," Katniss tells her. "A family."

Effie blinks and looks away. Her eyes are watery when they meet Katniss'.

"Thank you," she says, reaching for Katniss' hand. She remembers herself a second later. "Oh, look what I've done! There's dirt all over your hand."

"It's fine, Effie," Katniss says, not minding it at all.

A loud thud is heard and Katniss sees Haymitch emerging from the house with a large dirty watering can in his hands. He looks a little moody.

"Found it," he announces.

Effie makes a face.

"Haymitch, that looks like a walking disease," she complains, putting the glove back on. "Do wash it before using it."

"I have to carry it to wash it, don't I?" He mumbles, nodding at Katniss. "Hey, girl."

"Hey," Katniss replies. Haymitch takes the watering can to the hose and washes it — very quickly. Effie still makes a face but Haymitch ignores it. Katniss starts to walk back. "Uh, Peeta asked to let you know he's bringing lunch later, so you don't have to bother making anything."

"Oh, he doesn't have to," Effie says. "I'm perfectly capable of crossing the street, you know."

"Don't push it," Haymitch warns her as he waters the flowers. "You're doing enough as it is."

His words are a little brisk but his eyes are kind, almost soft when they look at Effie. She mumbles something Katniss can't quite catch, and Haymitch hands her the flowers.

When Katniss reaches the porch the flowers are already being planted by Effie; Haymitch catches Katniss' eye and nods — a silent thank you. They have always understood each other with little to no words. Katniss waves silently and goes back inside the house.

Something feels different now. As if their dynamic has changed.

She supposes they could be a family, the four of them. They only have to allow themselves to be.

They  _all_  deserve one, in the end.

**Author's Note:**

> Would love to know what you think of the story :) Thank you for reading!


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